stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
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