Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
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