I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize
