Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Randomize
