i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
