Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
You left your underwear on the fireplace
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Randomize
