arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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