HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize
