like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
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