problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
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