Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
True strength comes from lack of pants
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize