As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
