I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
