Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
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