Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
