So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Randomize
