At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Randomize
