I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
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