is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Randomize