new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
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