I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
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