you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
So many bounce houses so little time
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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