everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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