And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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