Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Randomize
