I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
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