This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize
