are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
Banned from zoo.
Again?
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Randomize
