he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
it's great music for shaving your balls
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
