Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
Why are your pants in the freezer?
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
Randomize
