I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
