If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Randomize
