Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
Randomize