I could have mohawked her pubes.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize