so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
Randomize
