just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
Randomize
