I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
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