Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Randomize
