where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
Randomize
