i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
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