I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
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