so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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