we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
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