normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
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That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
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