I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
