So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize