why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
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