Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
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