do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
Randomize
