That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
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