I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
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